When you are raising a child and you are no longer together with the other parent, it is likely that you will be attempting to coparent and coordinate as a team. In an ideal world, the two of you will be able to discuss things in a healthy and balanced way and you will be able to resolve minor conflicts in a sensible manner.
In this way, the child or children in question will benefit because they will be able to have strong relationships with both of their parents and they will be able to see that each parent has respect for the other.
However, past events and relationship history can make it difficult to have a healthy relationship with your ex. When all attempts at coparenting seem to fail, it is important to consider the effect this has on your children. If they see that you are arguing on a regular basis, this can have a negative effect on them.
If you face this situation, here are some possible solutions.
Think about your children first
Instead of having anger or resentment toward the other parent, consider what action would be in the best interests of the child. This might help you to make decisions that will be beneficial to your relationship in the long run.
Take away the emotion
If you cannot get along with the other parent, try treating the interaction that you have like a business transaction. If you focus on the facts and on the communication, it is more likely that everything else will fall into place.
Consider mediation
Having a third party mediate the situation can go a long way toward healing a coparenting relationship. This mediator could be a counselor, therapist or a professional mediator, and they can help the two of you to get back onto the same page.
If you have been suffering because of a toxic relationship between you and the other parent of your child, it is important to consider ways to improve the coparenting relationship.
If all else fails…
Remember that parenting time arrangements can be changed. Talk with a family law attorney to learn about your legal options.